I want you to notice that I am a camera now.
a camera that observes, that captures, that records.
a bloody camera.
not an energy source anymore.
cos I don't think. I don't think authentically anymore.
So I don't produce a s..t.
I just follow up. as a camera does.

I keep alternating my life to capture the best possible experience.
I keep changing places to live, people to love, problems to solve.
But I don't make any experience for anyone.
no, I don't inspire anymore.
no, I am not a weirdo now.
remember I am a f.. camera.
not an energy source that enlightens surroundings
a source that seeds the free artistic thinking.

just wanted you to know.
so, maybe I don't feel so cold.
I feel my bipolar swings and my darkness comes again.
But I want you to notice that
I am a fking clown in charge this time.
a French clown.
I should have smile while I do my chores.
How many times did you have to fake a smile?
you know how...
so, just notice...
maybe I can't cry and write as I did before.
But I'll be recording, though.
I can show you the details later.
a damn camera, I am,
remember?


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